Crunch Time

Published: November 2, 2013 ~ 1

By Laura Edwards

Two short weeks from now, the finish line of the Thunder Road Half Marathon will be behind me. After five months of training and countless lessons about my sister’s dark world, it’s hard to believe that it’s almost here – and that once we cross the first timing mat, the journey of a lifetime will be complete in about two hours’ time.

We’ve gotten some great media coverage and have more on the way. If you live in N.C., pick up a copy of the November issue of Endurance Magazine. Taylor’s amazing story of courage on the race course made the cover! Click here for a note from the editor about the article. The South Charlotte Weekly ran a nice article a few weeks ago. The Charlotte Observer will print a story about our upcoming race tomorrow. We have more TV coverage on the way as well.

Wednesday night just before 10:30, Andrew and I embarked on a 4.11-mile run on the twisty streets of our neighborhood. Encumbered by the cul-de-sacs, speed bumps and rumble strips that have accompanied so many of our training runs, we checked in at a 9:43/mile pace. When my friend and guide dropped me off at my mailbox at the end of the run, I didn’t have a scratch on me and had two healthy ankles – both good signs. I haven’t fallen since my crash landing in mid-August – still my only accident throughout five months of training for Thunder Road. But as I read and reread the stats for our run, I knew I wanted to get FASTER.

10-mile run

This morning, Andrew and I headed to an office park area south of our neighborhood – the site of my longest blindfolded run to date – for just our second daytime run. I strapped on my new Camelbak water bladder pack; crowded water stations aren’t the place for a blindfolded runner, and the pack is a great solution for my hydration needs and all of the other random things I need for a long run (license, health insurance card, Shot BLOKS, etc.).

I wanted to run 10 miles today. The last time we went to the office park, we ran up and down one road that has light traffic on Saturday mornings, hills to train for Thunder Road (not known for being flat) and a chance to practice our turns. Andrew asked me if I thought I’d get bored running the same stretch for 10 miles, to which I responded, “It makes no difference to me!” After all, when you’re blind, the scenery’s all the same.

Running in a dark world as the fog lifted to reveal a bright, sunny day in Charlotte, I could have let my imagination take me wherever I wanted to go. But I stayed grounded, both for safety and to remember every moment of what may have been the last time I put on a blindfold before race day. I felt the sensation of cars as they passed, even though they moved to the center lane to give us room (we didn’t have any encounters like the first time we ran on that road, when a driver in a Porsche flew by and scared me so badly that I jumped into Andrew and almost knocked him over). I felt the “corrugated” texture of the bridge of the interstate beneath us and asked my guide to help me avoid the painted white lines on the road, because they felt slick.

Andrew 10-mile run

I also heard the voices of other walkers and runners. Andrew narrated their reactions to the crazy blindfolded girl wearing a purple backpack, most of which began as shock, then changed to slow recognition and finally a big grin and, sometimes, a thumbs up or a wave. We stopped to talk to two of the runners, one of whom teaches at The Fletcher School, the school Taylor attended for six years. I didn’t realize until later that without even thinking about it, I removed my blindfold long enough to say hello – which Taylor couldn’t have done. It felt like the polite thing to do, but when I pull that blindfold over my eyes, I really do want to blind myself – to experience my sister’s world and to remove all of the privileges that come with being sighted. I don’t intend to take off the blindfold at any point during the race. I’ve solved the water station issue, but more recently, I’ve thought about awkward things like restroom breaks, and whether or not I can skip them for 13.1 miles. I can hold it for 10. I think I’ll just force myself to hold it for 13.1.

Andrew and I reached our goal, after all. We logged 10 miles, my longest blindfolded run by far. We hit about an 8:45/mile pace, good for 1:27:42 even with a couple of stops for SHOT Bloks and the quick visit with Andrew’s friend from Fletcher. My PR for ANY 10-mile run is 1:20, set at the Tar Heel 10 Miler this April. So I feel great about what we accomplished this morning!

I’ll share a secret with you, too: for a brief period of time during today’s run, Andrew cut me loose. I ran down the center of the quiet street, the bungee cord that is my lifeline coiled up in my left hand, my guide just a few steps away. I picked up my speed, and I felt free as a bird. During those fleeting moments, I felt my sister’s presence. And I didn’t fall.

I will run the Thunder Road Half Marathon blindfolded to support gene therapy co-funded by Taylor’s Tale at the University of North Carolina Gene Therapy Center. Donations to this cause are 100 percent tax-deductible. To support my run and our fight to develop treatments for Batten disease and other genetic diseases, click here.

Join the Taylor’s Tale team and help us turn Thunder Road purple for Taylor! Click here to register for the marathon, half marathon or 5K. On the second page of registration, under “Event Groups/Teams,” select “Taylor’s Tale” from the list under “Choose an Existing Group.” Wear purple and run for us to help raise awareness on race day. If you’d rather cheer, stay tuned for details about the official Taylor’s Tale cheer station on the course! Contact me with any Thunder Road-related questions.

Fuel for the Journey

Published: October 27, 2013 ~ 5

By Laura Edwards

A couple of weeks ago, Andrew and I broached the topic of hydration for the upcoming Thunder Road Half Marathon. Thunder Road, like most races of any considerable distance, offers water stations every two miles along the course. But if you’ve ever run a race with water stations, you know they’re a human traffic jam. I always try to slow down enough to avoid sloshing water or Gatorade down the front of the volunteers (often kids and their parents) manning the stations as I take a tiny paper cup. But a lot of runners come through the water stations like an animal stampede, and the stations at some of the bigger races are a mishmash of tangled legs and sweaty bodies and spilled water and electrolyte replacement drinks.

That said, Andrew and I decided weeks ago that the water stops at Charlotte’s largest race are the last place a blindfolded runner and her sighted guide want to be. But I can’t run 13.1 miles without water. I’ve never liked the fuel belts that hold small bottles of water and strap around your waist, and I worried that I wouldn’t be able to take the bottle in and out of the belt on the run without my vision. I often carry a water bottle on my longer solo runs, but on race day, I’ll have the bungee cord in my left hand and want to keep my right hand free.

hydration pack

My brother, Stephen, is into mountain biking and suggested I buy a small Camelbak pack with a water bladder. I’ve hiked hundreds of miles in America’s national parks, but my hiking pack isn’t what you’d call road race material. So this afternoon, I went to REI and bought a purple Camelbak pack. I’ll need to take it on the road a few times before the race to get used to the extra weight and bulk, but I’m excited that I solved the water station dilemma.

I ran 10 miles close to my target pace yesterday and followed up with a 5.2-mile run today. My ankle injuries of summer and early fall seem like distant memories, but I’m not taking any chances. And with the Camelbak purchase, I’m almost set for Thunder Road.

The purple pack will provide my body with fuel for my 13.1-mile journey in the dark. And while conventional wisdom tells me there’s nothing more important than water for survival on the race course or in life, I’ve got something much stronger fueling my fire to complete the race of my life and keep fighting long after Andrew and I cross the finish line.

I’ll let you in on a little secret: seven years ago this past July, I promised my little sister I’d save her life. But I haven’t succeeded, and now, all of a sudden, Batten disease is running a lot faster than me. That makes me mad as hell. I don’t like to lose, especially when people I love get hurt. And THAT, more than the coldest, freshest water or the world’s best sports drink, is my fuel for the journey in the fight of our lives.

The Real Heroes

Published: October 26, 2013 ~ 4

By Laura Edwards

Taylor finished the 5K race at Thunder Road in 2008 guided by two angels and the wings of her own courage.

Three weeks from today, I’ll run the biggest race of my life. I’ve run Charlotte’s Thunder Road Half Marathon three times since 2009, but on Saturday, Nov. 16, I’ll run it blindfolded.

Late Wednesday night, I went out for training run number 16 with my pinch runner – my husband, John. The temperature dipped below 50 degrees for the first time this autumn. I left my black tights at home to make myself more visible to passing cars, and though I didn’t see the goosebumps on my legs, I felt them. I called out manholes and irregularities in the road to my inexperienced pinch runner – not the other way around – but I stayed on my feet and didn’t suffer any sprained ankles throughout 2.18 slow miles.

As much as I love my husband and appreciate his willingness to take me out for a run at 10:15 on a weeknight, I can’t wait to get back on the road with my friend, Andrew Swistak, a seasoned runner born to lead the blind(folded). I feel safe when Andrew’s on the other end of the bungee cord, even though I had a crash landing on one of our training runs back in July. With my friend’s coaching in my first race of 2013, I conquered a nasty hill at mile eight, found energy I didn’t know I had at mile nine and set a new personal record (PR) for 10 miles. With Andrew’s help, I believe I can run not only a safe race, but a FAST race for Taylor at Thunder Road in three weeks.

But this isn’t about me, and it’s never been about me. So more than a fast time or an injury-free race, I’m hoping for this: that my 15-year-old sister, who’s had a rough few months in her fight against infantile Batten disease, will be well enough to come to the finish line. I want her to be the first person I see when I take off my blindfold. I want her to be there so I can give her a sweaty hug and tell her how much I love her, even though she can’t say “I love you” back.

Because the battle Taylor fights every day is a thousand times tougher than running a race in the dark.

I’ve spent hours blindfolded, but I’ve never been blind. I’ve vowed not to remove my blindfold at any point during Thunder Road, but if I wanted to see the endless sky above my head and the pavement beneath my feet and the bare November branches and the crowds lining the streets, I could do so.

I’ve never been blind, but I think that perhaps losing sight of the real purpose is the worst kind of blindness.

Taylor, and the several thousand others living with Batten disease, and the millions of people worldwide facing a rare disease without a single approved treatment or cure, are the real heroes.

The moment I forget that – the moment I make the story about myself – I’ve lost my way, and even Andrew won’t be able to lead me back.

Join the Taylor’s Tale team and help us turn Thunder Road purple for Taylor! Click here to register for the marathon, half marathon or 5K. On the second page of registration, under “Event Groups/Teams,” select “Taylor’s Tale” from the list under “Choose an Existing Group.” Wear purple and run for us to help raise awareness on race day. If you’d rather cheer, stay tuned for details about the official Taylor’s Tale cheer station on the course!

One Month to Go

Published: October 17, 2013 ~ 0

By Laura Edwards

This is it. One month to go. On Saturday, Nov. 16, I’ll rise before the sun. I’ll go through the familiar process of shuffling into the kitchen to eat a bagel and drink a glass of water, pulling a chilly, purple tech shirt and tights over goose-pimpled skin and lacing up my Brooks shoes on the back doorstep. I’ll snap my Spibelt pack around my waist, stuff a few energy chews into my pack, check my phone’s battery life and pin my race bib onto my shirt. I’ll sling a short bungee cord over my shoulders. I’ll make my way to uptown Charlotte. And sometime between 7:15 and 7:45 a.m., I’ll temporarily blind myself with a purple blindfold. It won’t be the first time I’ve blinded myself. But it’ll be the moment my sighted guide and I have worked toward for months.

I don’t know how much I expected to have to train for a blindfolded half marathon. More than 20-odd times, that’s for sure. But last night, we logged just our 15th training run in four and a half months. I hope we have a few more practice runs in the weeks to come, but even if we don’t, I believe Andrew and I could run the Thunder Road Half Marathon tomorrow. We ran 4.05 miles after much of the neighborhood went to sleep last night. Our speed still isn’t where I want it to be, but I think that the twisty roads, speed bumps and cul-de-sacs have something to do with that, too. I can’t wait for the freedom of the race course.

On race day, pace/speed will NOT be my main concern, but I think I – WE – have it in us to post a great time. And if the going gets tough, I know that all I’ll have to do is visualize my sister running her first 5K on that same course five years ago, facing the world’s worst disease but refusing to let it stand between her and the finish line or the life she wanted to live. I know that the image of her living her dream will stay with me for all 13.1 miles as I run to the light.

We have a lot to run for.

Are you with us? Read on to find out how you can join us on race day, either in person or from afar.

Join the Taylor’s Tale team at Thunder Road! Click here to register for the marathon, half marathon or 5K. On the second page of registration, under “Event Groups/Teams,” select “Taylor’s Tale” from the list under “Choose an Existing Group.” Run for us to help raise awareness on race day. Stay tuned for more details, including special shirts for team members and an informal post-race event! If you’d rather cheer, stay tuned for details about the official Taylor’s Tale cheer station on the course!

A Glimmer of Light

Published: October 3, 2013 ~ 0

By Laura Edwards

Under the watchful eye of the crescent moon and several stray clouds a few minutes after 10 last night, I pulled a worn bandanna over my eyes, took one end of a short bungee cord and took off with my sighted guide at my side for blind training run number 13.

Andrew set an easy pace for our four-mile run; we never averaged better than a 9:02 mile (of course, I saved my best for last; it doesn’t make sense because I’m a natural sprinter, but I get faster as I go). For the first time, we also played it safe on all of the ankle-breaking obstacles, walking over the decorative stamped concrete strips and speed bumps. With the Thunder Road Half Marathon just about six weeks away, we didn’t want to risk another ankle injury.

I can’t see shapes or colors through either of the “blindfolds” I’ve used for training, but at night, flashing traffic signals, bright headlights and even the light from some street lamps penetrate the thin fabric. Last night, I made out a street light about halfway through our run and figured out our location in relation to my house.

Batten disease is a degenerative disease. Everyone’s different, but what that means for Taylor is that she had all of her abilities and seemed healthy until about the first grade, and she didn’t have any physical problems until a year later, when she began to lose her night vision. She went blind over several years, losing first her night, then her central and finally her peripheral vision. I’ll never forget a moment outside a year-round Christmas shop on the South Carolina coast during a family vacation a few years after her diagnosis. When we walked by the shop, Taylor mentioned the “pretty Christmas lights,” stopping us all in our tracks. I don’t know if my sister ever saw the lights on her own Christmas tree again after that hot summer night at the beach. But when that glimmer of light darted into her shadowy world and brightened it, if only for a moment, it made my heart – if not my head – believe she had a very bright light waiting at the end of her twisted, dark tunnel.

“It made my heart – if not my head – believe she had a very bright light waiting at the end of her twisted, dark tunnel.”

My sister and I are not the same. I can still see flashing lights through thin fabric, and I can take off my makeshift blindfold whenever I want. Last week, I custom-ordered the thickest blindfold I could find; it should be here any day now. I’ll wear it at Thunder Road, because I want to run as my sister ran: in total darkness, with nothing but my guide and Taylor’s courage to lead me to the end. And when Andrew and I cross the finish line, I’ll rip off that blindfold, and I’ll take in the light with the two working eyes God gave me. Because I know tragedy, and it makes me want to fight that much harder to hold on to all the good that I have.

A Blind 10K, and Some More for Good Measure

Published: September 28, 2013 ~ 4

By Laura Edwards

This morning, Andrew and I did the most normal thing in the world: we drove to an almost deserted office park south of our neighborhood and warmed up with a .82-mile jog at about a 9:00/mile pace. But that’s when we threw “normal” out the window: when Andrew handed me one end of a short bungee cord, and I pulled a purple blindfold down over my eyes, blocking out the brilliant sunlight in the cloudless sky. That’s when two runners – one sighted, one blind – stepped into the bike lane facing traffic and picked up the pace for a 6.5-mile run.

Blind run number 12 marked not only our longest run to date, but also our fastest. Over 6.5 miles, we averaged about an 8:30 mile and even briefly dipped into the sixes on some of the downhills (without taking a double face plant). I ran faster with the blindfold than without it, even at the end of the run.

With the exception of one large loop in an offshoot, we traversed the same road – a road with a gradual climb – several times and made a U-turn each time we reached the end (doing so allowed us to practice our double U-turn skills!). That gave me a very different sensation from all of the tight cul-de-sacs and speed bumps in our neighborhood. The road also included a bridge over Interstate 485, with a different surface from the pavement covering the rest of the road. The bridge felt like corrugated cardboard beneath the soles of my high-cushioned Brooks running shoes. We passed a few walkers, runners and cyclists. Andrew told me that once, we passed a woman wearing a purple shirt (purple is the color for Taylor’s Tale). Another time, he told me that a mother driving with her teenage son in the passenger seat slowed the car and pointed, urging her son to look at us (I smiled with my eyes beneath my blindfold when Andrew told me that). We – or at least I – had one scary moment when a driver came flying down the road in our lane. Without my vision, I had no concept of whether or not I was about to be hit by a car, and I instinctively jumped toward, and almost into, my sighted guide (and my stomach jumped into my throat). Andrew told me the car was about 10 feet from us, but the driver was speeding so quickly that I felt all of the car’s force in my bones. I wonder now if Andrew felt the same way, or if I felt it at a heightened level because I couldn’t see it coming.

My goal for the Thunder Road Half Marathon is to average at least a 9:00 mile. I ran faster than that in the race last year and think that with Andrew’s direction and Taylor’s courage to guide me, I can match that even without the gift of sight.

news 14 filming

p.s. Earlier, I called today’s outing blindfolded run #12, but I didn’t count this past Monday, when I donned the blindfold and ran with Andrew for a News 14 Carolina story that aired in Charlotte. You can watch it online here. More coverage is on the way, so stay tuned!

As a reminder, I’m doing this crazy thing not just so I can talk about it, but to help support our fight against Batten disease and to save people like Taylor. Read on to find out how you can support our efforts through my run as well as how you can join our team on race day. If you plan to run for our team, please send me a note ASAP (even if you won’t register ASAP) to help us plan. Thank you!

The Path Not Chosen

Published: September 18, 2013 ~ 4

By Laura Edwards

Charlotte’s Thunder Road Half Marathon is less than two months away. I could run a full marathon tomorrow, but I promised my little sister, and the rest of the free world, that I’d run the half marathon blindfolded. That’s right – blindfolded. I gave myself five months to learn to run in the dark, guided only by the feel of the road beneath my feet, verbal instructions from and occasional tension placed on a three-foot bungee cord by my sighted guide, Andrew Swistak.

Five months sounds like plenty of time to learn how to be blind, right?

When I woke up this morning, I’d run in my world of darkness a grand total of nine times. Andrew and I live pretty crazy lives, so it’s not always easy to get together, even for a 30-minute run.

So tonight, when my husband, John, said he’d pinch run for Andrew for a second time, I had my blindfold on before John could lace up his shoes.

My husband is talented at many things, and I admire and love him for taking a turn on the other end of that bungee cord – my lifeline on these runs. But he’s not an experienced runner like Andrew, and while Andrew’s only led me on eight blind runs, eight is a heck of a lot more than one. On top of that, my ankles are still wobbly, and I just put 60 miles on them in Grand Teton and Yellowstone National Parks.

So we took it slow – 11:33/mile over 2.07 miles, to be exact (almost three minutes per mile slower than my average pace for a half marathon). We had a few hiccups. We haven’t mastered our spacing or our tension on the cord or our timing for turns the way Andrew and I have mastered all of those things.

But I didn’t fall. I didn’t hurt my ankles. And when you have 20-20 vision with contact lenses and you promised the world you’d run a half marathon blind, 10 practice runs in a blindfold feels better than nine practice runs in a blindfold.

And my pinch runner and I might have been slow as a couple of snails on practice run number 10, but I like to look at the bright side of things. I got to spend time with my husband – time I wouldn’t have had with him otherwise; I didn’t hurt my ankles, whereas quickening my pace could have been dangerous; slowing down helped me experience sensory things, such as the feel of a divot in the pavement, a “hello” from a passing neighbor and a cool breeze on my skin, autumn whispering after the lingering summer heat died with the setting sun.

I woke up this morning hoping I could notch blindfolded run number 10 with Andrew, my sighted guide for the Thunder Road Half Marathon. After all, the more miles we log together, the better we’ll be together on race day.

But instead, I hit the streets with my pinch runner. And though it’s not the path I would have chosen, I made the best of my situation.

Race training schedule conflicts don’t come anywhere close to having a monster like Batten disease in your genes. But we can’t do anything to turn back time; to change what’s already encoded in Taylor’s cells. Though we cherish the memories of the days before the knowledge of Batten disease came crashing into our lives, we can’t look back. We can look at the photos that captured Taylor’s eyes when they could see; in my mind’s eye, I can see her running down the beach and crashing into the waves, her golden locks blowing in the breeze and her silent laughter filling my ears.

We can’t bring back the past, but we can change the future. We can change it for lots of Taylors.

Batten disease isn’t the path I would have chosen, not in a billion years. But I’ll make the best of this situation, even if my own life depends on it. I’ll keep running this race till the very end.

Blind Training with a Pinch Runner

Published: August 24, 2013 ~ 0

By Laura Edwards

Running isn’t much different from riding a bike without training wheels. Once you know how to put one foot in front of the other, you’ve basically got it. My mom says I look funny when I run. She may be right – the uneven wear on the soles of all of my running shoes betrays my weird gait – but it works. I still have blue ribbons I won for the 50-yard dash in elementary school, and for 20 years, no one could outrun me on a soccer field.

But running blind is a whole different story. In less than three months, I’ll run Charlotte’s Thunder Road Half Marathon blindfolded to honor my sister and support the fight against Batten disease. I started training with my sighted guide, Andrew Swistak, on June 5. Since then, I’ve fallen once, sprained both ankles and torn up a knee. That’s why, if I expect to cross the finish line in one piece on race day, I need as much practice as I can get.

Andrew and I can’t always get together, though. I’ve learned a lot of lessons doing this blindfolded running thing, one of which is that we’re both very busy people! So this morning, I informed my husband, John, that he had to pinch run for my sighted guide.

“That’s right, honey,” I said, handing him one end of the three-foot bungee cord that serves as my lifeline during my blind runs. “Be my eyes, and you won’t get any new medical bills.”

We hit a few rough patches where we couldn’t get our spacing right, and I clipped his feet. Running with my husband in broad daylight helped me understand just how in sync Andrew and I became after only a few runs in the dark. But we got the hang of it, and we even picked up speed at the end. Best of all, I didn’t fall or re-injure my ankles!

Near the end of our run, John pulled to a stop and told me to open my eyes (I didn’t have a blindfold today). Right when I did, a deer crossed the road in front of us. And then, just like that, it disappeared into the trees, and I closed my eyes and started running again.

Later, I thought about how Taylor would have missed that deer. I blind myself by choice for these runs and will blind myself for Thunder Road, but I can recover my vision at any time. Taylor doesn’t have that luxury; a monster called Batten disease stole her vision and a lot of other precious things from her.

And that’s why I run.

When to Fold a Hand

Published: July 28, 2013 ~ 0

By Laura Edwards

In case you haven’t heard, I’ll run Charlotte’s Thunder Road Half Marathon blindfolded to honor my sister and support the fight against Batten disease and other rare diseases on Nov. 16. I’m a seasoned runner with a drawer full of half marathon and 10-miler race medals. But I’ve never run a race of any distance without my vision, so my training for this race is unlike anything I’ve ever done before.

I returned from a long weekend in the North Carolina mountains this afternoon and made plans for a late-night run with Andrew Swistak, a good friend and my sighted guide for Thunder Road.

But just an hour after I messaged Andrew, I aggravated the still-weak ankle I injured on our first training run, all the way back on June 5. I don’t have any idea how I hurt it; I felt a sharp pain walking from my back door to my kitchen. In any case, I’ll be brushing up on my R.I.C.E. skills (rest-ice-compression-elevation) right about the time that Andrew and I would have met at my mailbox for blindfolded run number eight.

I’m frustrated about this latest setback, which may end up being nothing more than a one-day punishment – perhaps my body’s gentle way of telling me that I wore the wrong shoes to traipse around downtown Asheville, NC for two days. I’m sorry I won’t squeeze in a practice run tonight but am grateful, really, that logic won out in the end. Because the last thing I need is an injury I can’t overcome.

My sister’s fight against Batten disease has its ups and downs, too. She has good days and bad days. She has a heck of a lot of courage – far more than I’ll ever have – but even so, some days, the disease still gets the best of her. For her sake, we have to know when to fight back with everything we’ve got, and when it makes sense to fold a hand so we don’t lose all our chips in the end.

I might be taking tonight off, but I’ll drag my body – bum ankle and all – back out on the road as soon as I can. And I’ll cross that finish line for Taylor on race day, even if I have to crawl. You’d better believe I’ll fight for my dream – to save the lives of people like her – until we win.

I will run the Thunder Road Half Marathon blindfolded to support gene therapy co-funded by Taylor’s Tale at the University of North Carolina Gene Therapy Center. Donations to this cause are 100 percent tax-deductible. To support my run and our fight to develop treatments for Batten disease and other genetic diseases, click here.